For every great television program there has to be a good cast in order for the show to be a success. The main character must have an excellent backstory and many conflicting characters and then, the main antagonist. There’s always one asshole that stands above the rest, and sometimes it turns into the only reason you watch the show.
1. Ari Gold – Entourage
This short-tempered super agent portrayed by Jeremy Piven is simply one of the best assholes on TV today. From his crude sexual references to his hatred towards his gay former assistant, this savage asshole walks around berating men and women alike. Tune in to the HBO network sundays at 9 p.m. to witness some of the most brilliant writing backed up by Jeremy Piven cussing out celebrities and family members, an excellent family program to watch with the kids.
2. Perry Cox – Scrubs
This sarcastic, quick-witted asshole IS the reason everyone watches Scrubs. Always fast with a comeback or a relentless rant Dr. Cox, played by John C. McGinley, is the chief of medicine at Sacred Heart Hospital and the main characters (Zach Braff) worst nightmare. Braff portrays a shy yet talented up and coming doctor named John Dorian a.k.a. J.D. If you would like to see J.D. verbally abused each and every one of his workdays by Dr. Cox tune into ABC soon for a new season.
3. Celia Hodes – Weeds
This female asshole portrayed by Elizabeth Perkins is the definition of a bitchy housewife. This vicious cougar is a critical part of this show, she hates on her daughters more then anyone. Later in the seasons she becomes addicted to a cocktail of different drugs and goes on a bitchy rampage. Start from season 1 and watch Celia progressively scold the ones closest to her and ruin her relationship with Mary Louise Parker’s character, Nancy Botwin. This show can be found on the Showtime network at 9:00 on Monday nights.
4. Kenny Powers – Eastbound and Down
If you were to take all of these assholes listed, combine them together, then take the censorship off their words, you would create Kenny Powers. This foul-mouthed ex-pitcher played by Danny McBride is always quick with a devastating insult because of a drug induced panic. Tune in to HBO at the beginning of 2010 for the most anticipated second season.
5. Eric Cartman – South Park
This fourth grader at South Park Elementary is the main reason why people grow up to be assholes and are put on this list, they start young. If there has ever been a television character that speaks his mind, Cartman is that young man. This Jew-hating, racist, masogynistic, wildly insecure asshole voiced by creator Trey Parker is pretty much the only reason to tune in and watch this show. The second half of season 13 kicked off on October 7th at 10:00 p.m. on Comedy Central.
6. Barney Stinson – How I Met Your Mother
Barney is the epitomy of a masogynistic, self-absorbed asshole who is overly concerned with high fives and corny catch phrases. But it is for this reason that he is one of my favorite assholes on TV today. Neil Patrick Harris has created something truly special with this character, tune in to CBS mondays at 8:00 p.m. to catch this asshole at work.
